OK, here we go again...

(Tune, The Devil Danced In Empty Pocketsby Joe Diffie

Well I was staring at my monitor screen, just the other day
"Command and Conquer" is by far my most favorite game to play
But suddenly I heard a sound which made my blood run cold
The devil started speaking, and havoc started wreaking, on my poor PC's soul

CHORUS
Now the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time
He corrupts my files with his wiles, and won't let me go online
And as he raises cain on my daisy chain, all I can do is whine
Oh the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time!

Well I was down at the Mudcat Caff, checking out the DT
As I strolled along, I found a song tailor made for me!
And as it printed off, I gave a cough, for I knew it weren't the norm
Cause it printed a whole ream of phrases quite obscene in Sumerian cuneiform!

Now the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time
He corrupts my files with his wiles, and won't let me go online
And as he raises cain on my daisy chain, all I can do is whine
Oh the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time!

Now they say the Net is God sent, you bet--the most useful thing since the nail
But I can't see the Maker, just that rotten soul-taker, now I can't even check my mail!

Now the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time
He corrupts my files with his wiles, and won't let me go online
And as he raises cain on my daisy chain, all I can do is whine
Oh the Devil plays inside my modem, and he has a hell of a time!


--Mbo