NAME: Puddin' Tame

REAL NAME: The same

YOUR NAME IN THE STATES: censored

Not that it matters, but do you live in Idaho?    Yes      No    Maybe

Sex:   Male    Female   Other   None   Unsure    Yes, please   No, not now

N/A

Circle Last Educational Level Attempted:

Grade School   High School   College   Grad School   More   Less   None

1. You are in charge of a platoon which has been ordered to attack a hill defended by ten thousand people who are armed with everything you can imagine and then some. You have 40 people. What do you do?

A. Carry out the mission no matter the costs!

B. Take a vote on what to do.

C. Flip a coin: heads we go for beer, tails we take a nap. (as long as I get to use my coin)

D. Tell the guy who told you to do this dumb thing to go &%$! him or herself.

2. Reference: US Rifle, Caliber .30, M-1: What is the name of that little pin that holds the forked rod that goes into the spring? The pin that you're always dropping and without which your M-1 won't work? Do you know? If you do, will you please tell me?

Doohicky

3. What is the maximum rate of fire for the Musket, caliber .69, "Brown Bess" Model 2? Why should you care? Nobody uses flintlocks anymore anyway.

42

4. Explain yourself. Try to be coherent.

Anyone who really allows any personal irritation to alienate them from supporting the right of everyone to be seen to be given a fair crack - does not really understand how hard the struggle to ensure this has always had to be.

And I fear that they will only have themselves to blame when they wake up to find they have not only had this right taken away from them - but will have played an active role in this.

5. How would YOU go about putting the Budweiser back in Clydesdales?

Send him to school.

6. Can you sing? Should we let you do so? Why?

No. Yes. Because.

7. You've drunk 3 glasses of Devil's Piss, 6 Pink Panty Droppers, and a Purple Jesus or two or three or more. What will you drink next?

Molson's

8. Physical Examination: Can you pat your head, rub your tummy, and
play the bagpipes, all at the same time?

My bagpipes were stolen.

9. If a locomotive leaves point A at precisely 1317 hours and travels towards point B at 124 kph, and a second train leaves point B at 1333 hours and travels towards point A at 89 kph, what shithead should be blamed for putting them on the same track?

Train kept a-rollin' all night long
With a "heave!", and a "ho!"
But I just couldn't tell her so

10. Do you speak a language other than English? If so, what? Now translate the following:

No. Akkadian

    Mert lofrát tinglû, Mers Fluggan. Dejit nørcamt en enciente y camino Ưstanŋų ber þyatnö finger locamisso Ægonicus nostros. Amen.

"My hovercraft is full of eels."

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I'd like to thank you on behalf of the group and ourselves and I hope we passed the audition.