Only I ain't in flippin' Amersterflippindam OR Haliflippinfax! I'm on flippin' BOAT! A flippin' ICEBREAKER on the way to flippin' LABRADOR! And the Coast Gard is makin' me WORK my way back to flippin' CANADA!

There I am, boarding the boat, lookin' for the flippin' bar, and this woman comes up. And she, like, looks pretty good and she asks me if I need help and I say, "YEAH! I need the kinda help you acn give!" and the next thing I'm up in front of this other woman, only she's got, like, lots of gold stripes. And it turns out that I'm flippin' SUPERCARGO and I gotta work my way back to Canada CLEANING TOILETS for these boltholes and there is NO BEER and NO DOPE on board! and they call the toilets "heads" and so I'm the Head Head Cleaner and everybody FLIPPIN' LAFF AT ME!

You just wait til I get back to Blind River! I gotta git off this right now becuase I can only use it for so much time each day. Its worse than the flippin' public liberry!