I don't define myself as a secular humanist, although I suppose many of my views would support that definition. There have been arguments that Humanism is too dismissive of other animals and of the planet itself, preferring to look only to the welfare of humans - speciesism, I guess. The Fransican prayer quoted, while it can't very well be argued against by any 'good' person, perhaps isn't very representative of the saint himself, who was a friend to all creatures (leaving politics out of it for the moment - centuries old religious politics is a deep, deep dark valley to enter).

Going back a ways in the conversation, this:

"If the conversation has the element of respect for whatever difference there may be betwen two people, the amount of common ground is often quite surprising to one or both parties" - WYSIWYG

...is what I was trying to get to, but previously Susan seemed intent on insisting that non-theists must argue in terms of theism to gain respect or understanding. There wasn't the suggestion that theists might try to see the points made by non-theists, which is surprising, in the light of her knowledge of communication theory and strategies.

Interestingly, on another thread here this morning, a Christian castigated non-Christians for using scripture to attempt to undermine Christianity. This 'devil may quote scripture' mindset further complicates dialogue, as it suggests non-theists are not believed truthful if they do not argue theology, and not believed truthful if they do. Which goes a long way towards explaining the odd fact that in the US, a person professing any faith is trusted over any atheist.

I find, hard as I try not to unduly insult theists, and Christians in particular, as I am surrounded by them, the same courtesy is not extended to me as an unbeliever. Christians often casually insult the godless, without even thinking about it, or even realizing they may have hurt someone they may actually like. The Christian 'club' is so large that many seem unable to realise there are still a few 'outsiders'.