He was only a lavender cowboy
And the hairs on his chest were but two
But he wanted to be a real hero
And do as the real heroes do

Herbicinis and other hair lotions
He woould rub on his chest every night
But when he awoke in the mornin'
Not a new hair was in sight

Well, he fought for Red Nellie's honor
And he cleaned out a whole robber's nest
He died with his six guns a'smokin
But with only two hairs on his chest

And they buried he out on the prairie
Where the coyotes howl every night
And in the place where his bones lay
two cacti have grown into site

(unrecorded performance of Burl Ives)