"How can we lovers of life and freedom deal with that mentality?"

Everyone loves life and freedom. They love to be alive and do things freely the way they think is the best way and the right way. They want freedom to live in their chosen fashion without outside interference. That is what all disputes end up being about.

Now, in the course of such a dispute, certain people become desperate enough or bitter enough or angry enough that they turn to self-sacrificial tactics like suicide attacks. I know from my WWII history reading that there were cases of American and other Allied pilots who deliberately dove their aircraft into enemy ships (or tried to) rather than spending their last few moments trying to bail out or somehow escape. Any nation contains some people who will become impassioned enough under great stress in an armed struggle to take what amounts to a suicidal action. The Japanese are more associated with it, because their culture had established a long tradition of such self-sacrifice, and they did it in an organized way, en masse. Thus, the "kamikaze" missions were launched.

The Russians also launched a great many attacks in WWII, massed attacks with infantry, that were essentially kamikaze-like in nature. At Stalingrad, for example, human wave attacks were launched by Russian troops into the face of German machine guns, and half those Russians didn't even have a gun! They were instructed to pick up a gun off a dead man when the opportunity presented itself. They died like flies.

What did they do it for? The usual reason: They wanted to be free of domination by foreign forces. They loved their way of life and their freedom to choose their way of life better than they loved being invaded by some foreigners.

This is always the case. All people instinctively fight for their accustomed way of life when they perceive that someone else is trying to take it away by force.

Thus it is completely illusory, in my opinion, to speak of oneselves as "lovers of life and freedom" as opposed to some group of opponents one has. Everyone loves his life and wants to be free to live it as he chooses, as he is accustomed to. It's when he thinks some foreigner is taking that choice away that he fights. When he takes the fight to the other guy's land, then he is putting the other guy in the same dilemma, and the other guy will react the same way. He'll fight to the bitter end to defeat the foreigner. Why? Because he loves being free to live HIS accustomed way of life.

All people love being alive, and being free to be exactly who they are. To not recognize this same impulse in one's bitterest opponents is to totally fail to understand their humanity...in which case you will no doubt find it easy to exterminate them without regret, I suppose.