Oh, man--we got home yesterday to discover that my dog had eaten something rancid in the yard and there was mess of both sorts in various places around the house. I don't even want to know what she would have written in her diary about that.

Didn't stop her from begging for our dinners later, though. Sigh. But dogs that barf on the rug get plain rice for a meal or two to make sure things are settled, so she missed out.