Link here, Guitar.

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“And Then He Kissed Me”,

based he (Stan Jardine) swears, on an actual experience.
And excuse the attempts to write the vocalisations in the chorus.

“I was walking up Brownlow Hill just the other day.
I ate my fish and chips and I threw the paper away.
Then a copper came up to me
He said “That is an offence, you see.”
He took me by the arm, put me up against a wall
and then he kicked me.

Chorus:

He kicked me in a place that I’ve never been kicked before
(Oo-oo-oo-oo oh-oh-oh-oh)
He kicked me in a place I don’t want to be kicked anymore
(wah-wah-wah-wah)

He took me to the station and
he robbed me of everything that I had
I asked if I could use the phone
to call me Mam and me Dad

Then a sergeant said very well
Took me off to a private cell
He took me by the arm, put me up against the wall
and then he kissed me.
Chorus:

He kissed me in a place that I’ve never been kissed before
(Oo-oo-oo-oo oh-oh-oh-oh)
He kissed me in a place I’d quite like to be kissed a bit more
(wah-wah-wah-wah)
(The rest is best left to the imagination.)