The BBC news story is
Here,


This old house is looking dated,
And the colour's looking faint
Think I'll use some linseed oil
To replace the flaking paint.
Some folks said this house was past it,
But I'm naming me no names
'Cos I've just now re-insured it
'Case the whole thing ends in flames.

Ain't gonna use this house no longer
Ai'nt gonna use this house no more
Ain't got time to oil the hinges
Or re-hang the bathroom door
Can't do no more renovation
Not the simplest little chore
All that's left is two stone chimneys
And a quarry tiled floor!