Oh, my aching head. What nameless stuff is IN that vile concoction called "beer"? How has the Earthling Shane survived this long if he drinks so much of it? I would have thought it was a plot on his part to kill all of us if I had not seen him drinking down his "two-four" with such obvious delight and gusto.

Unbelievable. He must be almost brain dead by now.

I am sorry to say that the Shane being also got sick, much sicker than I, because he drank so much of the beer so fast. He has regurgitated in the skyview lounge and made a very big mess there. We have put him in sick bay, along with myself and Meklor. He is a disgrace. I am beginning to wonder if euthanasia would be the kindest procedure for this Shane Being, but our code advises against it except in cases where there is no other good solution...

I will have to give it some thought.

We may have to rethink what to do with the beer. It could be held in reserve as the ultimate secret weapon in case the Arcturians ever decide to move against us...we would trick them all into drinking it and destroy their offensive capability in a single bold and clever stroke.

Meanwhile we still have to find out about the other most valuable Earth commodity, "babes". But that must wait until Shane becomes more coherent again.

Perhaps tomorrow.