I remember a borrowed old house to stay in, handpicked flowers tweaked by our florist friend, handmade dresses, punch doctored by old relatives, supper catered by other relatives, a lovely summer day.   There were some logistics to getting people together, but once there, it was pretty simple. It was simple and fun, uncommercial and unreligious.   No rehearsal.

I shudder to see the overwrought extravaganzas people put themselves through. I mean, it's just a gathering to solemnize a ceremony, and make a celebration of a new family being started. That's it. Nobody needs to be impressed with spectacular music, food, cars.

I guess we were avoiding lingering memories of other weddings: staying up all night making an overambitious menu the bride was way too involved in, fussing over elegant decorations til the last minute, melting too-high cakes, stressing about things running late, wedding 'managers', flubbed floral dyes, sick singers, bad singers, toddlers too small to behave in a wedding party, heavy expenses....