Thought you might like this one. I can remember most of the lyrics from when it came out (it was well played!).   If I've got any words wrong folks - put me right!

Bayswater Road

Those yellow lights down the Bayswater Road
Made you look Chinese to me.
I thought that you
Was little Ming Fu
Instead of Millie Battersby
From Southend-on-Sea.
We went out to dine
With candles and wine,
And, heavens, the wine, how it flowed.
I waited til the morning so my eyes I could feast,
I thought that I had found a gem, a pearl of the East
But all that I had found was you, you big, ugly beast,
Throught the lights down the Bayswater,
Lights down the Bayswater,
Lights down the Bayswater Road.