Little Rotten Johnny is in school one day and the substitute teacher is giving a lesson about fables.
You know what a fable is, dontcha?
That's right, It's a story that you can learn a lesson from.
So the teacher tells a few of Aesop's fables, then asks if any of the children have a fable...a little story from their lives that the rest of the children could learn something from.
Well,Little Rotten Johnny starts waving his hand furiously in the air, but the substitute teacher has been wraned to never call on little Rotten Johnny because he says such rude things.
So instead she calls on little Billie Day.
Billie tells about how he was staying at his uncle's farm for the summer, and his uncle had assigned him chores to do. One of his chores was to bring eggs into the house from the chicken coop.
He normally did it in two trips, but he was in a hurry to join his friends at the swimming hole, so he put all the eggs into a big basket and carried then to the house. The were very heavy and as Billie started up the steps he tripped and all the eggs were smashed.
The Teacher asked Billie what he had vlearned from this, and Billie said,"don't put all your eggs in one basket".
The class agreed that it was a good thing to know.
Then the teacher asked for another fable, and little Rotten Johnny was wavng his hand around, but the teacher didn't call on him. Instead, she called on little Jacqui Morse, who told her fable.
She said that she had visited her grampa who ran a dairy farm. Most of the milk was sent away to the plant to be made into cheese of ice cream, but her grampa gave her a big bucket of milk to take into the kitchen to drink for breakfast. so Jacqui started carrying the bucket back to the house, but as she started up the steps, she tripped and the bucket fell and the milk splashed away and Jacqui began to cry.
Jacqui's grandma can to the door and saw little Jacqui the .
So the teacher asked her what Grammy told her, and Jacqui said," She told me that there was no point in crying over spilt milk."
The class agreed that it was a good thing to know.
The teacher asked if anybody else had a fable to tell, but the only student waving his hand was little Rotten Johnny. There was no way to avoid it, so she asked Johnny to tell his fable.
"Well", said Johnny,"My dad was in the army in the war.
"Yes, prompted the teacher, while cringing a bit.
"well, he was goin' though France lookin' for Germans to kill, and he found one of those places where they make wine."
"A winery" she supplied.
"Yeah, that's it. So dad and his buddies broke into the place and took a whole bunch of wine back to his foxhole and drank it all up. When he woke up, he was surrounded by Nazis, so he picked up his machine gun and blasted those krauts on one side and killed some more with grenades and stabbed a guy in the eye and got him too."
The teacher cautiously asked Johnny what they could learn from this story.
Johnny said,"I learned that war is a terrible, wasteful experience that destroys lives, and people really die, and it isn't a proper subject for humor, or movies that make war look funny."
The teacher started turning away,a bit surprized and relieved, when Johnny added with a big grin, "the other thing I learned is that you DON'T FUCK WITH MY DAD WHEN HE'S DRUNK!!!!"
The next day there was a new substitute teacher.