This here is Ike Tomson. I live up here in Mayo. Raise chickens, usually lose some during the winter of course. While back a guy shows up lookin' like a fool but he was down on his luck and the Corporal at the Mountie post asked me to give him a hand. So I took him on for bed an' feed and put him to shovelin' chickenshit. All he had to do was to us a scoop shovel to move the chickenshit from the floor under the chickens' perches to the manure tank outside the barn. Then every couple months a truck comes and sucks all the chickenshit out the manure tank and takes it away to be turned into fertilizer.

Well anyway this morning this doofus is scoopin' the chickenshit when he slips on somethin' and slides right into the chickenshit tank, shovel and all. I come by and see him floatin' the in the chickenshit and pull him out and call the ambulance. I even give him artificial desperation like I was taught because I sure as hell ain't gonna give him no mouth-to-mouth.

So they took him into town to the hospital and he ain't dead but we think his brain might be hurt from the immershun in the chickenshit. Right now the docs are tryin' to figure out how to tell.

He talked about this innernet place a lot of times so I figured it was full of his freinds and so I thought I'd let you all know.

I'm afraid I ain't gonna hire that boy back because if you can't scoop chickenshit I don't know what you can do.

Your friend,

Ike Tomson, A Chicken Farmer
Mayo, YT