There was an infrequently given answer we heard once in the office that became a frequently given answer for a while.

We telephoned a company and asked if Mr X was in the office. "Not as such" came the response.

... Not "no", or "Sorry, he's not available" or anything like that. We spent an age trying to decide what the situation was that might make "not as such" the best response. Then it became a challenge to work that response into the conversation.