Hi Dave,
The first was a joke - I suppose from the same stable that produced the Duraham miner's story MacColl and Parker recorded while making 'The Big Hewer'.
A miner goes round to his mate's house to take him for a pint; wife comes to the door and tells him her husband died the evening before.
"What happened missus?"
"He was in the garden pulling a head of cabbage and he had a heart attack and died".
"That's terrible; what did you do?"
"I had to open a tin of peas hinny".
Jim Carroll