When I was just a boy in school,
I pitched Legion ball for pennies,
And the games were hard and the teams were good,
And the extra innings many.

On a summer evening in the Bronx
As rough as you've ever seen,
The innings went to twenty-two
And I pitched seventeen.

They sent their best against us,
They used their biggest guns.
But we stood them off for seventeen rounds,
And they didn't get a run.

And when the game was over,
We were spent in arm and soul,
A stranger brought a contract out,
With the big-league Orioles.

I was bought out by the Red Sox,
I was traded to the Yanks,
Spent many a game in the bull-pen line,
Without a word of thanks.

But when the game's hard up, boys
And the win is on the line,
It's then they call for The Reliever
To save the New York nine.

Now some swear by the fastball pitch,
Some say changeup's are the thing,
Ted Williams taught me the slider pitch
Will always make them swing.

IF you've got two runners on the bags
And you're down to three and oh,
That's when you need that slider pitch,
And it's Ted who sez it's so.

Today the major leagues have passed,
And I manage the Somerset team,
But the call from the house that Ruth built still
Comes echoing through my dreams

I can hear the crowds all screaming loud
And the seconds counting down,
I can hear them call "Reliever!!"
As I walk out to the mound.

I have one foot on the pitcher's mound
And one foot in the air,
And the slider I throw will retire the side,
And the Yanks will all be there.

If you look for me in heaven,
Just follow the loudest noise
I'll be with Christy, Babe and Lou,
Teaching sliders to the boys.