Hickory Dickory Dock
Two mice ran up her sock
One stopped at her garter
The other was smarter
Hickory Dickory Dock.

When I was in the service, we were all standing at attention for Captain's inspection. He was a stone faced old bastard and brooked no nonsense.
I was in the front rank, and just as he approached, a guy behind me said in a barely audible voice:

"There was an old womam who lived in a shoe,
She had so many children her **** fell off." (* I hate that word)
Guess who caught the Captain's attention?

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe,
She had so many children she diodn't know what to do,
Obviously.