Wee - when your wife is better....

TRAVEL!!!

Each country has its anal customs.....Germany - immaculate with little platforms to examin your creations.....France - grab the pole and lean back....China .... find a hole, any hole, and squat.....South America.....place the soiled tissue in the tampon-box and never flush it with the fecis....etc...etc....etc...

Be thankful you are a Brit....and a small little bit of your purloined paper came from the socialized taxed-estate of Prince Harold.

Sincerely,
Gargoyle