Secsy, are you looking over your shoulder? Do you notice movement just outside your range of vision from time to time? If you do, it's just the little group of elves detailed to keeping an eye on your every move from now on and until the Festive Season is over. And if one of them was looking through the wrong window on Sunday last, you can rest assured one of the others will have been more vigilant, so don't feel too sure that you can get away with fooling them.

Elf Snugglebutt has already reported back that Elf Dripplynose was caught oogling your tits. He says you've got great tits, but he likes the blue ones better. He was duly reprimanded and told to get back on the job in hand.

I'm afraid Santa may not be able to drive the sleigh himself, come the time. The poor soul has had a minor accident, you see. He was trying to fondle a raven black pussy, but it wasn't as friendly and docile as first assumed, so it sunk its claws into his hand and left him with severe scratches. His hands have now been bandaged, so he won't be able to do more fondling in the very near future, I fear. Hopefully, he'll be fully fighting fit for Christmas, but we've decided that it's better to let someone else be in charge of the sleigh. On the other hand this means, that you can safely let him have the Slow Screw he so desperatedly desires. I do think, however, that you're right in refusing to let the reindeer have any Buttered Rum. They'll do nicely on oaty bake bars.

SSS