Aha - but was this crime all that it seemed?

To be free – Or why the gnome ran away

To the tune of - Take It Easy – Eagles

(Guitar lick)

I was sitting on my toadstool trying to loosen up my load still
Seven pixies on my mind
One she was a dryad, another a cross-dressed hag
Boy I don't know what to decide

Take a pixie, or a nixie
Which female imp or elf is gonna please me
You can look but you can't touch
Cos they can magic a fire in your crotch
So when they put you on the spot
I run for the hills – me

(Guitar lick)

Chatting up the succubi running from the incubi
Women spelling trouble for me
There's a young dwarfess called Maisie – boy she drives me crazy
Think she'll be the end of me

I'm quitting fishing, I'm going missing
Gonna leave a note to make them think I'm stolen
Gonna run to a new pond
Where there's a goblin girl of who I'm fond
Hope they're not too upset when I am gone
But I will be free

(Banjo)

Woo-hoo-hoo, woo-hoo-hoo, etc.

I'm running for the hills – me
To take it easy
To a place where I'll be free
To chase the girlies...

(Banjo)

Woo-hoo-hoo, woo-hoo-hoo, etc.

Hyp