Tell you what there 'Gin......I'll let you know how this works out. See, I got me about 117 chip bags so far and I figure another 50 or so will do it. Problem is, I got gas somethin' awful and I'm gettin' zits, even at my age. I've got all of the bags split and most of the duct taped on the umbrella, and just last nite I hooked the sucker up. At this point, I gotta' tell you that the reception ain't any too good, but the program that was filmed in a blizzard came through real fine. The other bags oughta' improve things.

I'm hoping this works because the guy 2 doors down is getting suspicious about the number of porn movies that keep appearing on his bill and the guy in between us recently dug up a new flower bed and cut through my cable running to the other guy's cable box. Took me 3 hours in the middle of the night to get the damn thing hooked up again.

Spaw