Er, yes Azizi, I don't think I've ever seen you so flippant, I'm glad you're happy.

Here in the UK, the word "Fanny" is used to refer to the - er - how shall I put this? - "front bottom" so to speak, and I think that might have been a bit too exciting for some of us.

On the other hand, there is some scholastic concentration I understand on appreciating how it is that the arse has now become such a feature (in both sexes) of erotic attraction, rather than the primary sexual and principal secondary sexual characteristics.

In any event, I was surprised to learn from CSI the other night that in the US people do have implants in their arse cheeks. I'm more attuned to the common complaint "Does my bum look big in this?", and despite my own lack of slenderness I have always preferred thin women.

There has been some debate about the preferred profile of female arses - even in the James Bond books (that dates me) one of the Russian female assassins was noted to have an arse of which a purist would have disapproved, in that it had lost its smooth downward sweep and jutted like a boy's (I think I still nearly got that quote right after about 45 years). Be that as it may, my preference is for less arse on women rather than more.

I am however conscious that this may be an aspect of the institutional paedophilia over many many years of much of the western world (odd that despite this paedophilia is now perhaps the most reviled sexual preference - is it that people fear most the dark shadows they might see in themselves?).

Shall we discuss body hair as well?

I think I'd better go and have a cold bath.