BUY A GUN FOR YOUR SON
(Tom Paxton)
As recorded by Tom Paxton on "Ain't That News," 2005.

Hallelujah, dads and mommies,
Cowboys, Rebels, Yanks and Commies:
Buy yourself some real red-blooded fun!
If you want to make the grade,
You've got to have a hand grenade
And a fully automatic G.I. gun!

CHORUS: So buy a gun for your son right away, sir!
Shake his hand like a man and let him play, sir!
Let his little mind expand; place a weapon in his hand,
For the skills he learns today will someday pay, sir!

Pound that kid into submission
Till he's mastered nuclear fission.
Buy him plastic warheads by the score.
Once he's got the taste of blood, he's
Gonna sneak up on his buddies,
Starting his own thermonuclear war. CHORUS

Buy him khakis and fatigues,
And sign him up in Little Leagues,
And give him calisthenics as a rule.
Once you've banished fear and dreadm
Then pat his seven-year-old head
And send him off to military school. CHORUS

Once he's grown to be a man, he
Might get tired of blastin' Granny.
Then you'll see a crisis coming on.
Don't get worried; don't get nervous.
Send that kid into the Service.
Let him rise into the Pentagon.

At the Pentagon, he'll rise.
The President he will advise.
His reputation growing all the while.
With your picture on the wall,
He'll get that long-awaited call
And press the firing buttons with a smile. CHORUS