Emma, Skarpi isn't a native English speaker and has never been mean to anyone here. When he asks what you're 'getting at' he probably just means, 'I don't understand what you mean. Would you please clarify?'

My personal opinion: 'tits' is a nice, short word. It's not too long or precious-sounding and everyone knows what you're talking about. At least until you start talking about them liking black oil sunflower seeds and having nests near your house.

Irreverence is far more comfortable to me than listening to someone talk about 'breasts' in such a patronizing way that you know they damn near worship them. They make me feel that if I ever had to have one lopped off due to cancer or something, THEY think I might as well go right out and shoot myself.

If you think a body part is so sacred that it needs to be talked about in reverent language, you're sending the message that the body part is what matters about a person. There's a fine line between respect and patronization. Amos's 'Temple' has always given me the creeps, but smarminess always does that to me.

Your opinion may differ, and I'm OK with that. We all have different triggers. Sometimes, being able to function in a diverse group is a matter of overlooking triggers, whether they're someone else's or our own.