Caution: Bobert "True Story" to follow:

Well, first of all, I ain't gonna go on recors has sayin' I is 'er ain't the worst of best speller 'er typer in history but forget all that stuff...

The year was 1971 and I had returned from my Jack Keroack "Lookin' for America" tour, cut my hair for the first time since, ahhhh, sometime 'round '66 and got a job teachin' 5 'n 6 combination in Northern Virgina... Not too sure exactly how that went down as I was certified to teach high school history and governemnt but it went down...

Here's where this diagramin' of sentences comes into the story... SDeesm that I didn't have to diagarm the sumabiches in college and the last time that I was expected to diagram the sumabiches was like, ahhhh, 11th grade and I got a not-so-gentleman's-D 'casue I didn't have a clue but...

...here I was a very stoned out hippie (sans the long hair) hired to teach 5th and 6th combo and guess what the English curriculum had in store for me???

Well, you might have guessed it... Yup, diagramin' them sunabich sentences!!!

Man, geeze, oh man... Talk about workin' my butt off... I had to learn that stuff in less than a couple days... Fortunately, my first wife was an English major and she beat 'nuff into me to stay just a couple steps ahead of my students but just a couple steps... Never more than 2...

Now, as fir grammar??? It's okay but compared to a cold six pack of Iron City Beer, it's gonna come in 2nd every time...

Guess that's my story 'cept to say to any of my Catters buds...

...if yer gonna have a sentence diagramin' party, don't bother sending me an invite... Ain't 'nuff Iron City in yer frig to change my mind...

B~