Being a pirate is all fun and games, until somebody loses a lump...

Yer going to have to make up some sort of story about the scar,
now, something more vivid than "my body rebelled against itself
and grew something that didn't belong."

Did you get to see the thing? Did it perhaps have little feet,
hands, and a head? An alien perhaps? Or perhaps the ultimate in
ectopic pregnancies?