Da boss is in da fwon' room, so I sneekt in ere an usin da cwappy likl machine E keep in da bedroom. Mite hafta go sudden but I gotta twy.
Ere, Wozzy, you should be carful hoo you givin us too. Da bloke you givin me too is weerd, dangl me from battwoom light stwing, den set me to sit on a funnul an lissen to wadio all day, ask me wotts been on (like i takin any notiss) an E also seem to tink I some sort of slave, ask wy I not cleen up while he out boozin, ha, you should see da place, books an stuff all ova da shop. He OK tho, don' seem to mind I not kleen up, jus puzzld.
Ennyway, main ting, E keep askin if I a boy chewub or gurl. E seem to tink boy, cos E keeps singin (or sumthin close) Sir page yor finlandwin is over, an goin on about cannunns an clowver. Ennyway, E got me wondewin tooo, cos i had a look in da miwwer but can' see ennytin, not even wiff da side wot mak stuf bigger. An i can't feel anytin down dere. So now i puzzld too.
Can you find out four me, i don' no how i gonna tell im (don' tink E can ear me speekin) but i wanna no for me now.