OK, I've been known to grab a metaphor by the neck and strangle all the life out of it... but here are my thoughts this morning, as I wonder why I should leave my warm house, bundle up and head out in to the freezing cold:

I've had the pleasure of dealing with tourists firsthand many times, and have come to think of them as guests at a party. Think of the folks who show up at a big family party, many of whom you do not know, and do not even know who invited them.

I've roughly ID'd a few kinds:

There are the people who piss in the flowerbeds, throw cigarette butts out the windows. They are gently and subtly encouraged to top off and head on. If they don't get the hint, get your brother-in-law to tell them: you know the one!

There are those who have graced our presence from some neighboring, far superior town, and though they APPRECIATE SO MUCH the things we have to offer, it would be so much NICER if we did things thus and so, and everyone will be glad to hear how that little family business ought to be kept open 20 hours a day, 7 days a week, so much more convenient, and another thing, darling, this is just how things ARE, how they are DONE. Save me from such…. They are smiled at, encouraged to spend as much money as they would like, but it's so nice they have someplace better to go home to.

Then there are the people you immediately feel kinship with. You overhear their conversations, see how they interact with their charming, respectful children, how well they treat the coffee guy, and think, "wow, wouldn't it be nice if they lived here? If she was on the x Board, if they were my son's classmates?!" And you find yourself telling them things; the best place to get fresh eggs, the building downtown you wish someone would restore, a good church choir…..

Unlike Stephen Colbert ( ; ), I do see color. How nice the world is with all kinds of it! But the above scenarios, to me, have transcended race; I've seen them all. And I wish it were so for everyone, but know that it is not.

So for my part, when I feel like a tourist, I will try to be a well-behaved guest at the party, confident in my invitation, and knowing that part of the fun of life is finding our places together. I will be myself. And some will welcome me, and there are great things we can do together. Some never will, and it's both of our losses.

Anyone notice the interesting google ads popping up below?

Dani