I you take your clothes down to the river and beat them with rocks, you will end up wearing the "fertilizer" that runs off the feedlot, along with the "other fertilizer" that runs off the cornfield on the other side a few miles up the stream, the heavy metals dumped by the plating tanks at the manufacturing plant just aroung the bend, and probably will be rendered sterile (or strangely fertile) by the "outdated hormone tablets" flushed down the drain by your sister-in-law two states upstream - if you don't acquire a fatal infection from the "resistant bacteria" created by excessive use of antibiotics at the chicken farm.

Or you might be lucky and just wear clothing with lots of holes beaten into them.

Then there's the down side ...

John