Today's spam:   "Get your love life sizzling with your new giant tractor!"

Yeah. I can just see it. Me and my new giant tractor. There we are in the backyard. The tractors sits stolidly before me, gleaming in the sunshine, looking oh, so attractive and gigantic.

"So," I say to the tractor, "Feel like a little action?"

The tractor says nothing. It's just playing hard to get.

"Hey, baby, whaddya say we repair to the hayloft and 'put' er in gear'!"

No response from the tractor.

"Want me to check your oil?"

Still no response from the tractor. I might as well be talking to the damn wall.

And so on...

Finally I give up in disgust and go back to surfing the Net.