Must we really do this again? Oh, if you insist--

(1) Whatever he/she likes to listen to and can be inspired by.
(2) Whatever he/she doesn't enjoy listening to.
(3) Silly question.
(4) Silly question.
(5) Silly question.
(6) Sure. How else are you going to get lyrics, tunes, etc. But "expert?" No such thing. An "expert" is only an expert in what he/she knows. Ponder that. Oh, and how else are you going to get the latest raft of filth which is supposed to be funny or how else are you going to get dissed for ignoring the possibility that during certain phases of the moon, A# is not Bb? If you weren't computer literate, and couldn't pass time posting on the 417th thread playing at a definition of folk music, you might accidentally turn on Oprah and end up voting for Barack "I'm on Fire" Obama.
(7) Silly question.
(8) Silly question. You don't have to have voted for William Jennings Bryan to like folk music, though it might help.
(9) Hetero sapiens.
(10) Music as a hobby might help. Eventually they might invest enough time in it to learn a major scale. Beating dogs is fun too; Whoopie Goldberg says that's ok.
(11) You should be able to count the number of notes in an octave and frets on your guitar. Not to worry; we seem to have waived that requirement in a couple of cases I could mention. But won't. Gentleman. Ha! Pig's ear.
(12) Whatever gets you six figures, per diem and a company car. Me, I'm still working on that part.
(13) Absolutely! And every open mic should include a shtick that starts, "This is my interpretation of a potted geranium." Alternative answer: I'm having trouble learning to dance like a cat.
(14) If the majority votes "single," do I need to get a divorce? Silly question.
(15) I hope so. My most frequent open mic is in a dry hole. Number two is staffed by such blunted waitresses that your chances of getting a tankard, let alone enough tankards to ever get tanked, are slim to none. The only other place I've ever been moved to perform was one where the brew flowed freely, but after the last shooting incident I sort of dropped that one off my gig list.

There. That's the best I can do.

CC