"Homeless"

A man was walking down the street when he was
accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking
homeless man who asked him for a couple of
dollars for dinner.

The man took out his wallet, extracted two dollars
and asked, "If I give you this money, are you going to buy
some beer with it instead?"

"No, I stopped drinking years ago," the homeless
man said.

"Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?"
the man asked.

"No, I don't gamble," the homeless man said. "I need
everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Will you spend the money on green fees at a golf
course instead of food?" the man asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't
played golf in 20 years!"

"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you two
dollars. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a
terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded, "Won't your
wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm
dirty, and I probably smell pretty bad."

The man replied, "Hey, man, that's okay! I just want
her to see what a man looks like who's given up
beer, gambling, and golf!"