As I am currently cat-free, I have been adopted by next door's cat, who drops in and treats the place like a cross between a snack bar and a hotel. He and his meal-ticket are French. His name is Cha-cha. He is bilingual, speaking French and Fridge. We communicate in Fridge. As I type, he is lolling in the middle of the carpet. Grey and white and bad tempered. Stroke him and he bites you.
Not long after he arrived, I went to bed one night, thinking he had let himself out of the cat-flap and gone home. At 1AM, he appears, hops on the bed, peers in my face, mutters "wrong house" and goes home.