The first joke is one of my long time favourites. It must have been fifteen years between hearing it and the follow up.

A tourist gets cut away from the group while in the Notre Dame Cathedral. He wanders around by himself and ends up in the bell tower, only to find Quasimodo. He introduces himself and a wonderful conversation develops. Quite suddenly Quasi excuses himself, runs as hard as he can and drives his forehead into the bell, a loud 'Bong' emits and he returns to the tourist as if nothing had happened. Puzzled, the tourist asks why he did that. Quasi expalains that as it is one o'clock, it's faster to do that than to walk down the stairs and grab the rope for the sake of a single bong. The tourist accepts this explanation and the conversation continues. A while later Quasi says 'hey, it's coming on one-thirty, why don't you give it a go?' The tourist says 'oh no, I could never do that' Quasi persists and finally talks him into it. The tourist runs as hard as he can, head butts the bell, it gives the required bong, but on it's recoil it hits the tourist, knocking him out of the tower. 'Ah shite' says Quasi and winds his way down the stairs into the courtyard and through a large crowd that has gathered. The gendarmes are examining the situation and say to Quasi 'he fell from your tower, who is he?' To which Quasi says "I don't know the name, but the face rings a bell" Th Bishop dismisses Quasimodo because of this incident and recruiting of his replacement begins. Several candidates are interviewed, many with wonderful qualifications. A foreigner shows up and explains that he has no qualifications, but that it was his brother who fell from the tower and he wanted to honour his death by becoming the new bell ringer. The Bishop is moved by his story, and once he gets assurance that he would not employ the method that killed his brother, he allows him to give it a try. At one o'clock he heaves on the rope, gets the satisfactory "Bong" but forgets to let go of the rope. The recoil whips him out of the tower, the Bishop says 'Oh Shite', makes his way down to the courtyard and through the gathered crowd, only to get the same question from the gendarmes, "He fell out of your tower, who is he?" The Bishop replies "I don't know, but he's a dead ringer for his brother."