OK, let's solve it by process of elimination.

None of the feet are mine, nor do they belong to anyone I know. We can make a database of people these do not belong to, and then whoever is not in the DB, that's whose missing them. A result of leaving them in their mouths too long, or up their asses?

I know it isn't really funny. It's just so ODD that funny seems to be the only way to approach thinking about it along the way to seriousness.

~S~