"Lumber"

A new convert to Catholicism decided to go to
confession to deal with his transgression. In the
confessional, he told the priest that he had sinned.

"What was your sin, my son?" asked the priest.

"I stole some lumber, Father," replied the man.

"How much lumber did you steal?" asked the priest.

"Father, I built my German Shepherd dog a nice new
doghouse."

The priest replied, "Well, that's not so bad."

The man continued, "Father, I also built myself a
four-car garage."

"Well, now, that's a little more serious."

"Father, there's more. In addition to the doghouse,
the four-car garage, I also built a five-bedroom, four- bath
house!"

With a pause, the priest finally spoke. "That is a
little more serious. I'm afraid you'll have to make
a novena."

"Father, I'm not sure what a novena is, but if you've
got the blueprints, I've got the lumber!"