I wrote this set of lyrics for The Sailor's Alphabet last year to perform at the Nor Cal Pirate Festival in Vallejo, but somehow The Dogwatch Nautical Band never quite around to learning the words.
Looking back on it, though, I'd say it's pretty good anyway -- and just the thing for Talk Like a Pirate Day, which of course is coming up on Friday:
THE PIRATE'S ALPHABET Copyright (c) 2007 Claire Beorn Norman
A is for Arrrrrrh, 'tis a noise we all make, B is for Buzzards that soar in our wake, C is for Cutlass we use to excess, D is for Dead, as our victims attest.
Chorus: Speedily, speedily, so swift we pursue, No ship in the water is safe from our crew, We'll hoist the black flag and the high seas we'll sail, We'll make you, o'ertake you, and surely prevail.
E is the Entrails we spill every day F is for Fear and for fighting and fray. G is for Ghastly, like our reputation and H is for Honour, which ain't our fixation.
I is for I-Patch, though it's spelled with an E. J's for the Justice we sail for to flee, K's for the King's men who view us with rancour and L's for Lagoon, which is where we set anchor.
M is for Mayhem upon the high seas N is for Nancy, who's got a disease, O's for our Odour, which makes strong men balk; And P's for the Plank that you might have to walk,
Q is for Quarter, but we don't give none. R is for Rapier and Rakehell and Rum. S is for Scruples, of which we've got rid, and T's for our Treasure that's always well hid.
U is for Uproar, when-e'er we come near. V is our Victims, a-tremblin' with fear. W is for Wicked, and wayward and wanton, And X marks the spot where [spoken]...well, just never you mind. Arrrrh!
Y is for Yellow, the color of liver, Zed is Zeke Hoskin, shanghaied on a river That's an end to our letters, your approval please give. Give us all of your gold and We MIGHT LET YOU LIVE!