I think I found your Forest Ranger song Diana


The Lucky Ranger
(P.S. Lovejoy)
[tune: Johnnie and Frankie]

O once there was a ranger / Who always did his best
He wore the Service uniform / And a badge upon his vest
He had no interest / Save in his forest.

He had his breakfast early / Two hours before daylight
He hit the trail at sun-up / And kept it up till night
And half the night / He'd read and write.

O he was in demand / When trouble was in sight
For he could run a Whizzer / And he could also fight
Hell or high water / It was all right.

His pride was that he knew / His work from A to Z
From Abies to zylem / The Manual and sub E
And every part / He knew by heart

His mind was automatic / He never liked debate
He never hesitated / And never was too late
He could not make / A mistake.

He thought the world was skookum / But asked two things from life
That he should own a forest / And that he find a wife
For to marry / Was necessary.

One day a tourist's daughter / Got lost out in the brush
The 'phoned in to the Ranger / And he was there with a rush
They needn't worry / For he would hurry.

He tracked her down a canyon / And up a mountain side
And if he hadn't found her / She certainly would have died
But she was plucky / And that was lucky.

For when the ranger saw her / A great big grizzly bear
Had run her up on a pile of rocks / And he was a-keeping her there
And now the Ranger / Was in great danger.

But the Ranger ran right up / And pulled his forty-five
And the air turned blue with the smoke of it / But the bear was still alive
The fighting / Was exciting.

The Ranger's guns were empty / So he pulled his Bowie knife
For the bear was coming for him / And he had to save his life
And for a fight / That was all right.

But the Ranger he was losing / For he didn't have the weight
The girl saw things were desperate And she was most too late
But she was coming / And coming running.

The bear was bleeding badly / But the Ranger was all in
When the bear hit him an awful smash / And it looked just like a win
But in a clem / Cherche la femme.

The bear reached for the Ranger / Who had fainted with the shock
When the girl ran a hairpin down his ear / And beaned him with a rock
The with the knife / She took his life.

The Ranger's leg was broken / But they had to get outside
So the girl she carried him fifteen miles / And all the way she cried
For she was sad / And also glad.

She nursed the ranger well / And then one moonlight night
He said, "My dear, I love you / You certainly can fight
You saved my life / Please be my wife."

"O yes indeed", she answered / "But you certainly were slow
I'd rather marry a Ranger / Than any man I know
And I'd rather marry you / Than carry you."

"But we will have to wait, dear / For a while at least I fear
For I have no Ranger Station / And it may take me a year
The Supervisor / Is a miser."

"No! I can't wait so long / And anyway don't you care
We will get married tomorrow / For Pa is a millionaire
Pick out your forest / And get the best."

Well he thought of the old Uinta / And the Routt and the Medicine Bow
The Blackfeet and the Coeur d'Alene / The Crook and the Durango
But they all had / Too blamed much snow.

He thought of the Uncompahgre / The Gila and the Kern
The Modoc and the Klamath / But he was afraid they'd burn
And also / The Ochoco.

He wanted to make certain / There should be no mistake
So he took a trip to the Kootenai / And then to the Fishlake
And the Lolo / And the Mono.

The Leadville was too high / The Kansas was too low
So he passed up all of District Two / And still was on the go
To look still more / Became a chore.

But he said, "I am a Ranger / And the forest is my home
I must find one that suits me / And until then I must roam
It will be fun / To own one."

He went to the Pacific / And climbed up Mount Ranier
He looked around all Puget Sound / And then he said "I fear
That each is rainier / Than Ranier."

The Datil was too dry / The Chelan was too wet
The Inyo was awful dry / The Chugach wetter yet
In melancholy / He slipped his trolley.

Year after year he wandered / Till he forgot his wife
To find a perfect forest / He gave up all his life
He never knew that / He could not do that.

(pitch in minor)

Out in the scaler's cabins / Nights when the wind is high
The Scalers tell each other / "There's that Ranger goin' by
Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

Days when the fires are working / And there isn't any sky
And there is no grub or water / They here him goin' by
"Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

Noons when the crew finds water / And the cigaretts are made
They damn their job and the party chief / But they do not want to trade
"Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

Up at the Lookout Station / With his heliograph and phone
The Lookout talks to the Guards below / And they say "He's all alone
Poor cuss / He envies us."

"When the Beartrap District Ranger / Meets up with the one below
They damn the Supervisor / But they let the other know
"Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

When the Utah Supervisor / Meets one from District Three
They damn the District Foresters / But in this they agree
"Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

When the District Heads foregather / To hear the Big Chief tell
What they have next to tend to / They all think "Go to hell
But the poor cuss / He's worse off than us"

(back to major)

The Swartzwald suits the German / The Zielwald suits the Swiss
The Brittish like the Punjab / And it all comes down to this
"Poor cuss / Worse off than us."

And some folks like the hardwoods / And some prefer the pine
and some folks like the mixed woods / And I like spruce in mine
"My forest / Is always best."

And some folks like forests level / And some prefer them rough
And some want a little and some want lots / And each is good enough
"My forest / Is always best.

Jack Sprat could eat no fat / Far fields are always green
The other fellow has a snap / The Boss is always mean
O hell / It's just as well.