This is the version of the Long, Long Trail parody that my mother learned when she was a kid:

THE LONG, LONG NAIL
Tune: Long, Long Trail

There's a long, long nail a-grinding
Into the sole of my shoe,
And it feels as though it is stuck in
About a mile or two.
And when this march is over
I will give one glad shout
And sit beside the road and I will
Pull that long nail out.

G