My dad used to sing a version of this that he learned from his dad. We used to sing it in the car when I was small. Same tune as Sweet Betsy From Pike. We knew it as Are You Mister Reilly?

Are You Mister Reilly that owns this hotel,
Are you Mister Reilly they speak of so well,
"Cause of you're Mister Reilly, then blimey o'reilly
If you're Mister Reilly you ain't half looking well

(Chorus) Hold your row, hold your row
What d'you say, what d'you say
For the queen of society lives down our way
For the queen of society lives down our way

I called on my sweetheart, her name was Miss Brown,
She was having a bath and she couldn't come down,
She said she'd slip on something and be down in a tick,
She slipped on the soap and she did come down quick

(Chorus)

One day I met a poor boy in the street
He was ever so hungry, no shoes to his feet
So as I had money and plenty to spare
I went to the fruiterer's and bought him a pair

(Chorus)

There was a young man and his name was Lord Jim
He complained that his wife threw tomatoes at him
Now tomatoes are soft and don't injure the skin
But this one it did, it was inside a tin

(chorus)

One day I died and to Heaven did go
And where did I come from, they wanted to know,
When I told them from *(insert birthplace here, in my dad's case it was Catford so that's how I learnt it)* it made them all stare
Come in, said St Peter, you're the first one from there

(Chorus)

The way I learnt it, it was a one of those sort of trad cockney songs, music hall I suppose, like My Old Man's A Dustman and Your Baby Has Gone Down The Plughole and Knocked 'Em In The Old Kent Road, that kind of thing.

Gosh, that's brought back memories.