The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #115197 Message #2463558
Posted By: John Hardly
12-Oct-08 - 08:36 AM
Thread Name: Lyr Add: The Parrot Song (Simon Mayor)
Subject: Lyr Add: THE PARROT SONG (Simon Mayor)
Transcribed from Simon Mayor's "The Parrot Song"
Introduction:
Now, unusually, we've had a request tonight, not for a particular song or tune, but for a joke. I must say that the person who requested this joke has heard me tell it twice before, and I can only imagine that she han't got it yet. You've probably heard it, actually. It's the old one about the…
Two parrots sat on a perch and one turns and says to the other "Do you smell fish?"
We had some building work done on our house last year and I got on famously with the plumber and we were always crackin' jokes at each other. And one day I said to him, " 'ey, Derrick, Two parrots sat on a perch and one says to the other, 'can you smell fish?"
And he goes, "o-o-oh, yeah, 'at's a good joke in't it? ….but, y'know, a l'il tip. People would understand it be'er if you said 'There were two parrots what sat on a 'addock, and one says to the other…' "
Now if I say something interesting
Or something really nice
It's daft to only say it once
When I could say it…?
(audience) TWICE!
But herein lies a problem
And it really is quite sad
'Cause if you go 'round repeating things
People think you're…?
(audience) MAD!
No. A parrot.
CHORUS:
I'm a parrot (I'm a parrot) I'm your closest friend
I say the same things all day long a drive you 'round the bend
"Pieces of eight, pieces of eight, AWK! Oh, that pretty boy!"
Intelligent conversation is the one thing I enjoy.
Now, if I were a parrot policeman, I wouldn't say, "…'ello?"
I'd say, "…'ello, 'ello, 'ello, 'ello, 'ello..."
And if I joined the Army, now wouldn't it be super?
I couldn't be a Royal Marine. I'd be a parrot –rooper.
CHORUS
I'm a parrot (I'm a parrot) I'm your closest friend
I say the same things all day long a drive you 'round the bend
"Pieces of eight, pieces of eight, AWK! Oh, that pretty boy!"
Intelligent conversation is the one thing I enjoy
Now if I were a parrot (parrot), I'd fly around the garden (garden)
And I would live in the German town of Baden (baden) Baden (baden)
I couldn't live in Iceland 'cause the snow and ice would freeze ya.
So in the winter I'd fly off to sunny Polly-nesia.
CHORUS
I'm a parrot (I'm a parrot) I'm your closest friend
I say the same things all day long a drive you 'round the bend
"Pieces of eight, pieces of eight, AWK! Oh, that pretty boy!"
Intelligent conversation is the one thing I enjoy
Now If I were a parrot (parrot), I'd live in Hong (hong) Kong (kong)
I'd play tennis (I'd play tennis) and also Ping (ping) Pong (pong)
Yes I'd repeat (repeat) things (things) so soon (soon) everyone would know (know)
That the art (art) of saying (saying) things (things) just once (once) is dead (dead) as (as) a Do (do) Do (do) ….do.
CHORUS (repeat)
I'm a parrot (I'm a parrot) I'm your closest friend
I say the same things all day long a drive you 'round the bend
"Pieces of eight, pieces of eight, AWK! Oh, that pretty boy!"
Intelligent conversation is the one thing I enjoy