Dear Susan;
   Yes! Do wait! And I hope that 'Billy Bones' and 'GUEST' get a look soon too. Especially when it's wanted for any sort of publication, original copyrighted material and any permission really should be obtained from the author (imagine wagging finger). I'm quite tickled that people are singing (and I trust enjoying) my songs, since that's what they're for, but I do require that they be rendered correctly for publication, and I like to know where they'll appear. Private use can of course go completely off the map... and I'm flattered to have been 'filked' on one or two of my pieces. I can be reached at ImminentIdea@aol.com in case of questions.
   Fortunately the floppy drive surfaced, the files are being backed up in other locations, so below find the original grammatically, legally and morally approved version of "Cap'n Collins and the Mermaid", complete with obsessively exact punctuation. As this format doesn't support italics I've substituted capitals or quotations where needed. I've also added one verse with chords in D minor and A minor shapes, so people can see how pathetically simple my arrangements really are.
   Perhaps I should send along "Sweet Fanny Adams" as well at some point, since Mr. Google doesn't seem to know about this particular ballad (which I did not write), though poor little murdered Fanny is certainly well represented in British music and folk culture.

P.S. to Dave Swan: Hey, Dave! Long time no anything. You know, you could have just called Tom; he has my number.

The song:

CAP'N COLLINS AND THE MERMAID
(c1987 by Annie Lore)

1. 'Twas on board the "Bonnie Lillie",
Came a voice both wet and chilly;
'Twas a Mermaid singing shrilly,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.

2. Cries the Captain: "ho there, madam!
Please don't sing that 'Fanny Adams';
I hate that song with a passion;
Don't sing 'Fanny Adams'."
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Don't sing 'Fanny Adams'."

3. She drew herself up all the prouder,
Gave a scornful look about her,
Sang the gory parts the louder,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.

4. But the Captain, nothing daunted,
Told the crew a net was wanted;
Cast it o'er her while she taunted,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.

5. "Now alas!" the Mermaid pleaded,
"No such hasty act was needed!
Let me go on unimpeded;
I won't sing 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
No more 'Fanny Adams'!"

6. "Quitcher moanin' ", says the Captain,
"For a cage you'll soon be clapped in;
You will make a fine attraction,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'."
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'."

7. But near midnight came a roaring--
All the seamen stopped their snoring;
'Twas a sound distinctly 'foreing':
'Twas not 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
'Twas not 'Fanny Adams'.

8. "Oh, set my daughter free, by heaven!"
I told her be home by seven;
Here it is half-past eleven!
You'll get 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
You'll get 'Fanny Adams'!"

9. The crew they looked at one another;
"Save us! it's the Mermaid's mother!
We had best get under cover;
Curse that 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Curse that 'Fanny Adams'!"

10. Cries the Captain: "let her chatter!
She'll be tamer out of water;
We'll serve her just like her daughter;
She'll sing 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
She'll sing 'Fanny Adams'!"

11. The old mer-mother then 'submeraged';
Says the Captain, fair encouraged:
"You had no cause to be worried;
THAT for 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
THAT for 'Fanny Adams'!"

12. But an hour later hardly
Came a clamour most ungodly:
The Mermaid's EXTENDED FAMILY,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'!
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'!

13. Aunts and uncles by the dozens,
In-laws, outlaws, dads and cousins,
Plus some unrelated dolphins,
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.

14. The Captain cried: "I just can't take it!
Curse that song, oh how I hate it!
I went to sea just to escape it,
That song 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
That song 'Fanny Adams'!"

15. "Take your daughter with my curses;
Life with her is worse than worthless;
If I EVER see you surface,
I'LL sing 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
I'LL sing 'Fanny Adams'!"

16. They threw the Mermaid to her mum--
She cried, "them sailors ain't no fun!
They wouldn't let me have no rum,
And they won't sing 'Fanny Adams'!"
Refrain:
" 'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
They won't sing 'Fanny Adams'!"

Chords:

DM (AM)
'Twas on board the Bonnie Lillie,
C (G)
Came a voice both wet and chilly;
DM (AM)          C (G)
'Twas a Mermaid singing shrilly,
DM (AM) C (G) DM (AM)
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.
Refrain:
F (C)                  C (G)
'Fanny Adams', 'Fanny Adams',
DM (AM) C (G) DM (AM)
Singing 'Fanny Adams'.