It's a really nice song. Sounds like it could have been written anywhen. And that would be my only suggestion...

I went to a songwriting workshop a couple of years ago. One of the bits of advice I heard that really stuck with me is that, as a songwriter, you don't have to EVER accept that your song is "done". Oh, at any time, you may determine that it has reached a point of "Ready for prime time"...but I've even heard really great songwriters revise their songs WAY after public debut.

(one example -- a favorite of mine, LJ Booth initially wrote his famous "Some Believe" with the word "irregardless" in it. He played it that way before a national audience. But by the time he'd recorded it, he'd corrected it.)

You have the luxury as a songwriter of keeping the song as it is -- quite satisifed with it... AND STILL rewrite it to make it into something DIFFERENT. Not "better" ..... DIFFERENT and equally good, or saying something else -- something new that the old way doesn't say it.

Anyway, this is a long way of saying, that I don't see anything wrong with your song as it stands. And I see plenty right with it as it stands. BUT...

I'd at least TRY a re-write with some of the train cliches ("lonesome whistle" "Hear the wheels", etc) taken out and replaced with purposefully RE-coined phrases. See if you can't turn it from an "anywhen" song to a "anybody, right NOW" song.