Your Co-worker Could Be a Space Alian, Say Experts

YOUR CO-WORKER COULD BE A SPACE ALIEN, SAY EXPERTS
...Here's How You Can Tell

By Michael Cassels (for the NE)

Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look human - but you can spot these visitors by looking for certain tip-offs, say experts.

They listed 10 signs to watch for:

    * Odd or mismatched clothes. "Often space aliens don't fully understand the different styles, so they wear combina- tions that are in bad taste, such as checked pants with a striped shirt, or a tuxedo jacket with blue jeans or sneak- ers," noted Brad Steiger, a renowned UFO investigator and author.
    * Strange diet or unusual eating habits. Space aliens might eat French fries with a spoon or gobble down large amounts of pills, the experts say.
    * Bizarre sense of humor. Space aliens who don't understand earthly humor may laugh during a serious company training film or tell jokes that no one understands, said Steiger.
    * Takes frequent sick days. A space alien might need extra time off to "rejuvinate its energy," said Dr. Thomas Easton, a theoretical biologist and futurist.
    * Keeps a written or tape-recorded diary. "Aliens are constantly gathering information," said Steiger.
    * Misuses everyday items. "A space alien may use correction fluid to paint its nails," said Steiger.
    * Constant questioning about customs of co-workers. Space aliens who are trying to learn about earth culture might ask questions that seem stupid, Easton said. "For example, a co-worker may ask why so many Americans picnic on the Fourth of July," noted Steiger.
    * Secretive about personal life-style and home. "An alien won't discuss domestic details or talk about what it does at night or on weekends," said Steiger.
    * Frequently talks to himself. "A space alien may not be used to speaking as we do, so an alien may practice speaking," Steiger noted.
    * Displays a change of mood or physical reaction when near certain high-tech hardware. "An alien may experience a mood change when a microwave oven is turned on," said Steiger.

The experts pointed out that a co-worker would have to display most if not all of these traits before you can posi- tively identify him as a space alien.