Whilst enjoying my Friday morning Mudcat, suitably hungover from the various pints of Bombadier I drank at The Steamer last night whilst enjoying the assembled company of The Fleetwood Folk Club celebrating the joys of collective ambrosia - or was it amnesia? Whatever the case, it was catching - although Rachel brought in her 7-minute Tam Lin without a hitch, likewise Ron's masterly Outlandish Knight... Anyhoo, here I am piecing together the shards of my shattered consciousness when there comes a knock at the door and - guess what? Religious Canvassers! As an unrepentant Neo-Gnostic Marxist-Jesuist Humanist with a deep love of the spiritual & cultural traditions of Three, Three, The Rivals, my immediate response was to tell them to Fuck off and Go to Hell before closing the door in their faces (problem with these UPVC doors is that they won't slam). I must confess to feeling that it might have been a tad churlish to send these cheerful door-to-door missionaries on their merry way, even if they were Jehovah's Witnesses, without offering at least a measure of common courtesy or hospitality, though hopefully our house number will now carry a black mark against it, yeah, even in The Book of Life.

How do you approach these people?