I can't say I like your proposed ending; it quite spoils the dropped close, which as Bronson pointed out gives a mixolydian feel to what is otherwise a major tune.

I'm not crazy about it either! The effect of resharping the seventh in a Mixolydian tune is very much what I was going for, but in this case I don't much like what it does to the tune.

Many thanks for posting the Goodyear tune. That sharpened C is interesting, but I don't think it's prominent enough for taking it off to make much difference.

Anahata - thanks, I'm sure that's good advice. The idea of slowing it down is interesting, not least because it's counter-intuitive!