Speaking to the press today in Dayton, Ohio, Barnswell Skype stated his unequivocal support for Chongo Chimp for president. This brought an end to weeks of speculation as to which way Skype would go, and it will surely be a bitter disappointment to both the Obama campaign and the McCain campaign, both of which had lobbied hard to get an endorsement from Barnswell Skype.

"At the end of the day," said Skype, "I had to ask myself, who do I trust most to be in the Oval Office during a real crisis? Who can I count on to put the security of America first and not back down one iota? Who can I trust to fight for the little guy? For me the answer was compelling and clear, and the answer was Chongo Chimp."