Okay, so I threw in a smart-ass post or two on this one, but this is in fact an issue on which I have some fairly strong feelings. Admittedly after 100-some posts, my two cents is probably equivalent to beating a dead horse after the barn door has been closed, and whatever other two-bit metaphors I can come up with. But I didn't want to let it pass without at least a bit of comment.

Because even if I put on my "atheist cap," the one I wear when I'm skeptical even though admittedly I'm a spiritual believer (I feel obliged to wear it when pondering cosmology and the origins of the human species, among other things, just to keep me honest), I see nothing in Praise's post that is pandering, proselytizing, preaching, patronizing, oppressing, flag-waving, folding, spindling, mutilitating, sneezing, wheezing, grumpy, or any of the other handful of accusations that have been made towards it. I see her post as one that is honest and courageous, at an ethical gut level, and I think I would still feel so if I held no spiritual beliefs at all.

Whether you are Christian or not, religious or atheist, devout or "lapsed," reverent or iconoclastic, reflect for a moment on the truths, ethical or moral principles, and lofty ideals of kindness and respect that you hold dear, whatever their foundation, be it religious, philosopical, logical, or just plain personal "gut instinct." We all have, I think, that ineffible core that tells us what's decent in how to act towards others. Focus on that secret anchor in your own self, divorced completely from worldly (or otherworldly) dogma and doctrine.

Now imagine people perpetrating great harm, hatred, wounding, and atrocity, all the while claiming to be doing it in the very name of the principles you hold dear. Remember, this is your secret anchor. You know that your principles aren't the cause of atrocity, because you try to live by those principles every day, and you don't commit those harms. These people sound like you part of the time, except when they start twisting the meaning of those principles around to justify their meanness and hatred. Somewhere along the line, they just got it wrong, and you don't know if you can do a bloody damned thing to set it right. Fairly or unfairly, this is the face in which the world sees people who believe as you believe. Maybe you have never and will never encounter such a scenario in real life, but come along on the gedanken experiment with me just a moment longer: a moment to take into your hands and hold on to the deep frustration and pain such a realization might cause in you.

And in that last moment of indulging my imaginary scenario, realize that that is what I believe Praise was trying to deal with in creating this thread. She wasn't preaching at us about how Jesus Saves, she wasn't trying to convert any of us to Christianity or to her particular flavor of it, she wasn't telling us that our mortal souls are in danger of brimstone, hellfire and Dalmatians if'n we don't straighten up and fly just her particular brand of right. She wasn't putting words in anyone's mouth, although several have put words in her mouth in this thread.

She was doing just what her post advertised: expressing deep personal regret for the harms, and they are many, that have been done (and are being done) in the name of, and by, the institution of Christainity. Please realize that they distress Christians of good conscience and intent at our very core, and that the destructive Christians are just as willing to level their witch-hunt mentality at their Christian critics as they are to level it at pagans, wiccans, atheists, gays, and everyone else on their long list of enemies. What to do about this very issue, and the difficulty it incurs in bearing honest, unharmful Christian witness, is, as Susan relates, something that is very much discussed in Christian circles these days. We are trying to exorcise these things from our own hearts, not sweep them under the rug, as some might have you believe.

And Susan expressed the desire to speak amends for these things far better than I think I can, so I won't add much more, except to say this: be careful what assumptions you make about me just because I publicly declare that I am a Christian. Don't assume that I'm out to "save your soul;" that's your business (and the Creator's, should you believe in one). Don't assume that all this talk of openness and tolerance are just a ruse to proselytize and lure you into our Big Cult; I'm not half that clever. Don't assume that I'm exclusive of all other spiritual beliefs, because I'm not--I find nearly as much (sometimes more) inspiration in the Tao te Ching, the Quran, the Divan i Shams, the Book of Certitude, the White Buffalo Calf Woman story, and a host of others, as I do in Christianity's Big Book o' Goofy Mythology. I identify primarily as Christian, but also practice the Dakota Sacred Pipe and Native American Church spiritual ways. In fact, I was baptised only last year, and my baptism was blessed with the appearance of some marvelous animal spirits: a bald eagle, a turtle, a blue heron.

In short, I am in a number of ways a very different sort of Christian, I suppose, from Praise. But not in one very important, perhaps the only important way: I adhere to the same Law of Love, and because of it, I concur in her apology. Our Big Book o' Goofy Mythology carries in it a very important admonition to Christians: the standard by which we measure others is the standard by which we ourselves will be measured. It's a principle of which the Fallwells of the world would be wise to take greater note. Call it karma, call it divine retribution, call it what you will, but it all means this: the strong reaction some have had to what they saw as Christian proselytizing in this thread only goes to show how deep the wounds are that Christianity has inflicted, and how mean the standard by which Christians have too often judged people, including their own.

I applaud Susan for her effort to mend one small section of that great tear, and am only left to wonder how it is that I, too, can help.

Chris