Next to Seamus Ennis singing Football Crazy, this is my favourite piece of English footballing cultural commentary:

The Fall - Kicker Conspiracy

Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy
Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy
J. Hill's satanic reign [1]
Ass-lickers King O'Team
Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy x 2

In the marble halls of the charm school
How flair is punished
Under Marble Millichip, the F.A. broods [2]
On how flair can be punished
Their guest is a Euro-State magnate
Corporate-ulent
How flair is punished

Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy x 4

In the Blues Club, George Best does rule [3]
How flair is punished.
His downfall was a blonde girl, but that's none of your business!
Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy x 4

Former fan at the bus stop.
Treads on the ball at his feet, in the christmas rush.
And in his hands, two lager cans.
Talks to himself. At the back. At the top.

What are the implications of the club unit?
Plastic, Slime, Partitions, Cocktail, Zig-Zag, Tudor Bar.

Pat McGatt. Pat McGatt, the very famous sports reporter is
talking......there.

FANS! ! ! "Remember, you are abroad!
Remember the police are rough!
Remember the unemployed!
Remember my expense account!

HOT DOGS AND SEAT FOR MR. HOGG !!
HOT DOGS AND SEAT FOR MR. HOGG!!!
AAAAAANNNNDDD HIS GROTTYSPAWN! ! ! !

Lurid brochures for ground unit.
Our style is punished.

Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy x 5
Remember! don't collect with the rough.
Kicker, Kicker Conspiracy

Kicker, lets swell the facilities.

Kicker Conspiracy x 8

Notes:
[1] Jimmy Hill - BBC TV presenter on Match Of The Day
[2] Sir Bert Millichip - Chairman of the British Football Association 1981-1996
[3] The Blues Club was the Manchester City supporters club bar at Maine Road. George Best - 60's soccer icon - played for Manchester United, City's arch rivals, but he was still revered for his style and brilliance. Mark E Smith has said on UK TV that even though he's a City fan he often went with mates to watch United just so he could see Best play.